It’s Sunday morning here, amazingly all the kids are out, and judging from the noises from downstairs, my partner is chopping wood. I’m in bed 🙂 which is really unusual past 8 am … And feels fab !
Ive got loads of thoughts running round my head on this peaceful morning, but not in a stressful angsty kind if way, more a reflective, questioning kind of way.
I’ve written a couple of draft posts, about the deeper thoughts I’ve been having; but what I’m really thinking about is ‘ Explainations’
Yesterday I went out for the day with my closest friend – K. K and her husband J live down the road from us, and they are our best friends. We do lots together, as couples and families. We’ve done a lot of drinking together over the years too. About 15 months ago J was diagnosed with incurable prostate cancer. The emotional fall our from that is for a later date, suffice it to say it’s been huge.
So, K knows (obviously) that I’m not drinking and yesterday, being a special day out for us both I think she was expecting me to have a couple of
bottles glasses of wine, and she asked me “why not?”
What to say ….
- In the last year I had countless blackouts and many many unexplained bruises
- I had abnormal blood tests
- I was drinking well in excess of 70units a week
- I missed work due to drinking
- I wet the bed when drunk – twice
- There’s more but I’m too ashamed even to write it ..
I settled on “once I started, I just can’t stop”. Of course she let it go, but I could tell she didn’t really get it..
What do you say?
What conveys the importance of the decision, and that it is absolutely essential that I am successful, it’s non negotiable. Without ‘oversharing’; without seeming to be over dramatic … Without making others feel ‘bad’ …uncomfortable or judged for continuing to drink ..