Relief

I’m still sober.

I have been tested more in the last 36 hours than at any time since I decided to be sober. The sun, the pub, the holiday atmosphere,the ambience. This is classic heavy drinking opportunity. 

I said at the beginning of the blog that I was aiming for an attitude if mind that I didn’t WANT to drink alcohol. I proved to myself in the last 2 days that I’m far away from that utopia. 

I do want to drink. 

But I’m not going to for all the reasons we already know.

So. … I have been very active; today I ran 5k , swam in the freezing cold  sea , and went for a cycle ride. I have stocked up with AF drinks, but most importantly of all I have been very honest with j and k about why I cannot drink. I feel safer now . I think they would try to dissuade me if I went to drink, just as Mr Lily would. 

I have noticed how drinking is ALL around me; every leaflet inviting us to a social event, an outdoor play, a garden tour, an art exhibition, either includes a glass of wine with the price, or advertises free wine on attendance… Everybody is drinking, on the beach, in the pubs, in their boats. The range of gin in sale in the (small)  shop ifs extensive … I’m so aware of it all.

BUT , I can function in the early morning, I feel well , and I have added this (the 2017 version )  http://trescotriathlon.co.uk my list of sporting events I hope to undertake to raise money for prostate cancer .

Thank you for being my sober supporters. I don’t think I could face coming here and telling you all that I’d failed. You all keep me accountable. So today is day 154. I’m sober, and I will not drink tomorrow either 


14 comments

  1. Great job – you are slogging through the toughest…vacation in a beautiful spot! Yep, for right now just know that you aren’t drinking….regardless of whether you want to or not!

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  2. Yay! I will try to learn from your example, you trailblazer you! In three weeks we are going for AN ENTIRE MONTH to Europe. How is that possible to do sober? Neither my husband or I have spent time there, so it should be a uniquely challenging environment. Also, it is money we would have spent on rehab, so this is kind of a reward.

    What I think might work is reading another book that makes me sort of a sober warrior. Or I will reread “The Naked Mind: How to Control Drinking.” (It actually does not teach you to control drinking. It gives you enough scientific evidence to want to stop.) I then get outraged at the whole liquor industry and am able to proudly fling drink menus back at the waiters. (Just kidding. But it does give me a kick ass attitude.)

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    • Where in Europe are you going ? It will be an amazing trip ! My advice for staying sober through the holiday is this: don’t look at the whole thing. Break it down into small chunks and plan for the first couple… It gets easier after you have started, and planning for a day or two is not so daunting . Have a wonderful time xxLily šŸŒ·

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      • Thank you! I do run into trouble when I start to think about long-term sobriety. Focus on today! I have heard that a hundred times but still must be reminded.
        We are going to France, Italy, Germany, and Switzerland. I am looking forward to a lot of walking and sight seeing.

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  3. It is tough being on vacation.
    Make sure you have some treats that you enjoy.
    Good for you for being honest with your friends. Support is everything.
    Hug.

    No one ever Wakes up wishing they were hungover. Enjoy your freedom.

    Anne

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  4. If you’ve got time to read, Allen Carr’s team have released a book aimed at women which is a great little reminder of all the false reasons and mind tricks which make us think we are missing out on something good. It’s well worth a read. Enjoy your holiday

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