Day 190

Today is the 190th consecutive day I have not drunk alcohol. Coincidentally it is also 3000 days until I can (theoretically at least) retire from my partnership and Full time working.

Now that I am sober, the future I see has infinite possibilities;

  • there are a variety I’d skills I would like to learn / develop – knitting, quilting, baking / cooking (I do the latter two already, but would like to attend a professional course and get really good at it ) painting ( develop further) ; take up gardening –
  • i desperately want to travel. I’ve been nowhere really, and I’m so curious about other cultures and civilisations. I would love to travel a bit with my children, but accept that a ) they might not want to and b) I might not be able to afford to pay for us all.
  • when I am no longer working full time I would like to donate my skills to an organisation such as VSO and work overseas as a doctor for 6-12 months- it would have to be quite soon after retirement, whilst I’m still useful as a doc.
  • At home I would like to be involved in active charity work, or one form or another
  • and I want to cherish my friends, my family and build and strengthen relationships,

sounds quite cool cool doesn’t it.

If this is my 10 year plan ( realistically it’s likely to be 62 before I can stop, due to funding kids in education) then I need to break it into smaller,manageable goals to get me there …. This is a task I will undertake over the next 2 months…

Sobriety brings clarity of thoughts, it brings a sense of purpose to life that was previously lacking, it brings a sense of optimism and ‘point’ to the future that I have not felt before. Looking forwards, planning for my older age and hoping to have the opportunities to complete at least some of these ambitions, gives me a sense of true enthusiasm and confidence – almost elation, that despite more than half my number of years being complete on this earth, it is quite possible that the best ones are yet to come. There is SO much to anticipate with excitement.

ive lost my partner. The man I hoped to grow old with. But I haven’t lost my future – in fact, on the contrary I may have afforded myself a different, but equally exciting and fulfilling set of opportunities.


  1. Congratulations Lily 🌻That sounds like a great plan. I think it is quite telling that you have identified 5 things, they link together, they are specific and they are realistic but also exciting and stretching.

    When I was drinking I would never have been able to write a list like that – either I wouldn’t have had any idea what to put on it or would have wanted to avoid making a list because I would have been setting myself up to fail. If I had had a day of being determined to stop drinking – an intention which I would have dismissed later that day as I glugging done the first huge glass of wine – it would have been a wildly unrealistic list of all the ills sobriety would instantly cure. And we know that it doesn’t quite work like that !

    Anyway, I LOVE your list. Tori xxx


  2. Congratulations! Keep up the awesome work. Baking alone is good enough reason to quit drinking. Let me hear you say “Triple choc fudge browniess y’allllllll!!!!’


  3. Happy 190 days! Isn’t it a great feeling to be able to make a future plan, it’s something I was never able to do when alcohol was clouding my vision. xx


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