I’m going to be on the Radio. On National Radio. Next week. SHIT !
On Radio 5 live, next Thursday 29th December at 11pm.. Talking with two others about sobriety, abstinence at Christmas and the issues that brings.
I feel quite excited and also quite nervous. I responded to an invitation on SoberMummy’s blog, to contact a Radio 5 journalist about appearing on such a programme – and after we had chatted about it she confirmed today that I have been chosen to be part of the programme.
The BBC will pick me up from home in a cab, take me to New Broadcasting House, and return me home later. As the name ” Radio 5 live” suggests, It will be a live show and not pre recorded.
I have some broad idea of what we will be asked about, and she asked me if there was anything I was NOT willing to talk about.. but I guess it’s a ‘go with the flow thing’ and will be managed seamlessly by BBC production- I hope so anyway.
So, what are my feelings ? My overwhelming hope is that I can offer some encouragement and remote support to others, particularly health care professionals, who are struggling with drinking too much, and know they want to stop, but can’t imagine how that could happen. If one or two people hear this broadcast and think, ” If she’s done it , so could I” then I would be delighted. Alcohol overuse is so ingrained into our society and in particular amongst health care professionals, (for reasons I have previously explored, but might revisit) The shame and stigma of any kind of mental ill health, let alone alcohol dependence – is alive and thriving amongst many in health care. The opportunities to seek help are reduced due to fear of recognition, sanction and punishment, and this includes attending AA meetings, local drug /alcohol support and every other kind of medical intervention. The programme will give my blog a shout out, so that people have a way to contact me IF anyone should wish to.
I am a bit scared. well apprehensive. My regulator, the GMC, is well known for its punitive and long drawn out investigations into matters drawn to their attention, and whilst I very much doubt they would be interested in a very sober GP at this point, It’s still a fear. Then there are the normal concerns; what if I dry up ? what if I ramble and talk nonsense? what if I sound like an idiot?
On balance, I think reaching out, being open and honest, is the right thing to do. Maybe it will help someone else, maybe not. But I think it will help ME, still tentative and apprehensive, to get back out there and engage. I have butterflies in my tummy at the thought, but the feelings are easier to manage than others and on balance I’m excited and looking forward to this….Tune in or catch up on the BBC Radio iPlayer …