Giving up

A year ago, after the breakdown of my relationship I decided to get a second dog. As there were longer periods with no one at home, I thought it would be nice for Lola, our collie, to have a companion. Lola had been, and remains, a delight for our family ; and easy friendly placid dog who is loyal, affectionate and sensitive to Human mood. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has wept into her neck and been comforted by her obvious concern. 

I thought a new puppy would give us all hope and cheer, as well as being a friend for Lola. So I contacted Lola’s breeder and arranged to see her latest litter of puppies. Acting on advice we decided to get a dog puppy this time, and chose a Grey collie. 

It wasn’t easy right from the start. Slower to train than Lola, the puppy chewed relentlessly , he was anxious at socialisation classes, became distressed when the TV was on, peed in corners long after he knew where the garden was. By the time he was 4 months old he had become aggressive around food,growling and snapping when anyone went near. He hated being brushed, nipping and twisting away. 

We took him to the Vet who could not find a physical reason for his anxiety, and have me the name of a behaviourist who came to the home and worked with us. This didn’t really help to be honest and Jasper started Being aggressive to other dogs when out walking. At about this time the dog walker said he could no longer safely walk Jasper, due to his aggressive behaviour with the other dogs. 

I researched a residential training programme, and after talking with them, sent Jasper (at great expense ) away for 6 weeks retraining.

He came back in the middle of August transformed.

But it didn’t last. 

Last week my current dog walker,who now takes only my dogs out, told me Jasper had got into two fights with other dogs. He did similar when son3 took him to the local park with a friend. He’s resource guarding again and snapped at me yesterday when I went to put the refilled water bowl down. 

I realised how very stressful all this is for me, and that though I love him,we all love him, we are not the right Home for him. He needs much more activity and interaction than we can provide : and so with a heavy heart I have decided to re home him. The breeder has agreed to take him back, so I know he will be ok. 

I feel guilty, relieved and sad. He is such a loyal dog I know he will miss us, and we will miss him .. I think it is the right thing to do , but it’s hard , 


  1. It’s not giving up. I can imagine how hard it must be, but you’re doing the right thing..: being a pet owner is a responsibility, not a right or just a ‘fun thing’ (as you know!!!) so realising that he needs a different home environment is the caring right thing to do – especially as he’s going back to the breeder and not just passing him on to someone else you don’t know and can only hope will know better. In my opinion, a brave and the right decision, even tho a very sad one. Sending hugs

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    • Thank you. I feel dreadful when I think of him missing us, but in the longer term I think he’ll be better off. My nightmare at the moment is that he really goes for another dog and ends up being put to sleep …


      • As much as I hate to admit it to myself, they move on… My cat, who currently lives in London with my parents, years ago, used to pee and poo on my bed if I left her for even a weekend (she’d wait for me to return before showing her disdain..)- now, she’s happy as anything, being with my parents. A few of my pets have also come from other homes, first sad and scared.. and then happy… I am sure he will be the same, and the breeder will help find a more suitable home. I really feel for you xx

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      • When we took him back I asked the breeder what plan she had, ad she already had three potential homes for him. One who wanted him for agility (where his father is) and two others – experienced professional collie homes. I felt much better after that – as I know he will have a good future. And he will forget ..Its very quiet at home without him ..

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  2. Wow. You went well above and beyond to try to make this work. That admirable.
    It’s also sad he has to go, but clearly it’s the right decision all around.
    Say goodbye and let him go. I am sure the breeder will work to find him a house where he is the lone dog. He must be very well trained. Now he just needs his own place.

    Big hug.

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