Yesterday I met some sick people. Spiritually sick.
And it scared me.
On the positive side I recognised them, almost straight away, and they looked deeply unhealthy and terrifying to me. despite their energy and charisma I could see right past that to something egotistical, selfish and potentially cruel.
On the negative side I felt incredibly vulnerable, like a newly hatched chick with only the nest to protect me from a whole host of predators who would gobble me up and spit out my bones without a second thought.
All the emotional energy I have put into my recovery this week, all the thinking and reading and reflecting has left me drained – I have made progress but I feel drained.
So I’m going to take this day to ask others for what I need, look for some peace and self care, and try not to overstretch myself.
I went to a quiet but powerful church service at 8am. A nice lady introduced herself and that simple, normal Interaction helped me to feel safe again.
But I’m rattled nevertheless